Two More Days

I only have to hang on for two more days.  Just Thursday and Friday and then I am off for six weeks worth of self improvement, renewal, and recuperation from burnout.

Right now I am hanging by a thread.  Snow White's depression is just getting to her so badly that all she can manage to do is message me about it ad nauseum.  Everybody else at work has this question I need to answer or that report I need to get to them or some such thing before my leave begins.

Blah, blah, blah...  It's all just noise at this point.  The brain has already checked out.  The body is barely keeping up.  Must remember to breathe.  Breathing is good.

What I really wish I could do is just walk out of the office now, giving everyone I see on the way out a fine middle finger salute.

Snow White and the Evil Witch

Let me introduce you to Snow White, a coworker.  I've not written about her before here.  I certainly can't write about her on fb since we are fb friends even though she can whine and complain about whatever she wants whenever she wants because, oh my goodness, people just don't do things her way.

I call her Snow White because her looks remind me something of the Disney version of Snow White.  I count myself as the evil witch because I'll be damned if I had a poison apple I might be tempted to leave it on her desk.

Snow and I used to get along, but that was before... before she got promoted so that she is now at the same level that I am but in a different role.  Watching her transform from hard worker and stellar employee to entitled bully has been quite the education for me.  I have been amazed at the immense changes I have seen in her.

She has always been a little self serving, but she is quickly becoming a major bully in the workplace.  Because I'm her friend I've been spared (somewhat), but holy cow the havoc she wreaks around here on an almost daily basis is about to send me over the edge.  Guess it's a good thing I went ahead with that request for FMLA leave which will start next week if for no other reason than to escape this mess for a while.

I pick up a conversation she and I had this afternoon via IM.  I skip the first part because to put proper context on some of it would take too long.  We pick it up when she has been picking on someone whom I tried to defend.

Snow 4:37 PM

Ok. Well she certainly is vocal

Me 4:38 PM

definitely not the roll over and take it type like me

Snow 4:38 PM

Honestly, I think somewhere in between is probably best. She tends to go into it as if it was done deliberately to make her life worse

Me 4:39 PM

Which is generally how I see the world but accept that griping about it gets me nowhere

which is also why the stress builds up to the point it does with me and then I end up on a 6 week mental health leave

Snow 4:40 PM

I think I was told too often that I wasn't special, and that the world does NOT revolve around me to think that way

Oh, and the ever popular "don't be so selfish"

Me 4:43 PM

I suppose I think less that people deliberately sabotage me than I think they cover their lazy stupidity by saying things that make me feel like they are sabotaging me.

Snow 4:43 PM

I have occassional moments like that

That's totally spelled wrong

Me 4:44 PM

They "thought" they told me about that. They were "sure" I knew about that. Those are the times I feel sabotaged.

Snow 4:45 PM

Oh, those don't bother me. I think because I say them often enough to people since my memory is like swiss cheese

Mine is where they keep pointing to records as problems, but the problem is with THEIR system

Me 4:47 PM

See, and that wouldn't bother me because I could easily just reiterate that the records are correct and leave it at that.

Snow 4:47 PM

It doesn't bother me the first time. It bothers me when they come back with more "issues" again and again

Me 4:47 PM

It's mostly the ones where I feel accused of not knowing what I should when I feel that if they wanted me to know something they should have told me.

I can't just "know" when I don't know.

Those are the ones that make me want to kick people's teeth out.

Snow 4:48 PM

Meh, I just figure they forgot

Me 4:49 PM

Then they need to own that and not put the blame on me.

Snow 4:50 PM

I usually just say "oh, I wasn't aware of that" and redo the query

 

At that point, I just quit.  She and I are on vastly different wavelengths right now.  Perhaps I'm just a wee bit touchy that ever since I shared with her, in confidence, why I am taking the leave of absence, she has been suffering from the most overwhelming case of depression ever and has missed several days of work and is just in so much worse shape than I am yet she keeps soldiering on while I have clearly given in while suffering far less because I've been able to keep up a facade that she can't.

 

C'mon Snow White, I'd be happy to share my lunch with you.  Why look!  Here's a beautiful shiny red apple.  Have a bite.