Seriously?!?

It's been 8 months since i blogged? Seriously??? That is fucked up my friends, totally fucked up. I blame Facebook. I say everything I can say publicly on Facebook, and there just sin't a lot of shit in my life right now that I can't say publicly. I haven't had sex, clandestine or otherwise, in longer than I can remember. I could probably go back in this blog and find it, but it would just depress me. I haven't done anything truly outrageous in a long time. Somehow when I turned 50 I became an old fuddy dud. I kind of accepted that life is ovedr except for the mom part and the caring for W part. W is tough old goat, still hanging in there through one medical thing after another. Right now, he is enjoying his best health in probably 10 years. I'm starting to believe he is immortal... and not in a good way. Emotionally I think my relatonship with W is at an all time low. I don't really care about him one way or another except when he messes with N's head... and he messes with N's head pretty much constantly. I tried to get family therapy, even N was for it, but W refused. Of course her refused. He's right. Everyone else is wrong. I think he knows that by attending therapy that he would have to change, and change is not his best thing. I can't whine about W to the real world. I went back to him after all. I'm stuck. So here I am. Back in the saddle. Sharing my deepest, darkest thoughts again. Hi anybody who hasn't abandoned me long ago