Where's the Dust Pan?

FYI, I’m working on a post for Thursday Therapy that is a nice meaty thing. (Hmm, why did my mind go straight to the gutter after typing that? Hmm. . . ) This post, however, is fluff, just stuff floating around in my head the way gnats swarm rotten apples. This post is clearing my mind the way I need to sweep the floor under my bed.

Bit of fluff #1: I am sick and tired of the hoards and swarms of aphids flying around. According to local news sources the aphids live on soybeans during the summer and are now moving to their winter quarters on some other kind of plant. Would y’all just find a place and settle please? Thank you.

Dust bunny #2: I dreamed last night someone came in and cleaned my entire house for me – for free! – without any expectation of me doing anything in return! Alas, some dreams are just too good to be true, as I found when I woke up and opened my eyes to the same pig sty as always.

Cobweb #3: I missed Talk Like a Pirate Day again this year. Hmmph. I am bummed over that. I so want to have a party celebrating that day one of these years.

Scrap of thread #4: I’ve been trying to pursue a relationship with a woman (via the internet, natch) instead of a man since the breakup. You know, just trying to set men (idiots that they are) aside for a while other than caretaking W. Alas, one woman IRL on whom I have a major crush is absolutely 100% straight with no desire to explore otherwise. I know this because we talked about it long before I developed my crush during a casual conversation about men, women, dating, etc. Therefore, I will, of course, not even approach her. Damn her for looking so hot every time I see her though.

Piece of lint #5: Of course, as soon as I turn my focus on women a man pops up with major potential as a FWB. We spent an interesting evening a few nights ago sparring via text message and an even more interesting lunch yesterday. So, does an 11 year age difference make me a cougar?