Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day!

How could I not have known about this? If only N didn't have the "Big Soccer Tournament" this weekend I totally could have planned a kickass pirate party. Oh well. There's always next year. I've got a whole year to plan!

Check out the official Talk Like a Pirate website.

Arr, mateys, ye be invited next year to me house for a roarin' good party. Get your swashbucklin' gear together!

50 Q&A

I may have done this one before. If I have so be it. I'm too tired to look. If I did though it would be interesting to compare my answers from then (whenever then was) to now. Wonder how much they'd change in a few months or a year?

1. Do you like blue cheese? Oh yeah baby!

2. Have you ever smoked heroin? I didn't know heroin was something you smoked, but no I haven't.

3. Do you own a gun? No

4. What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic? I rarely go to Sonic, but I think once when I went there I added cherry to my diet coke, maybe.

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Not generally. I get more nervous waiting for results from the tests that the doctor orders.

6. What do you think of hot dogs? Umm, what do I think of them, well there are only a few brands of veggie ones that are any good. Yeah, I guess that's about all the thoughts I have about them at this time.

7. Favorite Christmas Song? All of them!!

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Coffee, lots and lots of black coffee.

9. Can you do push ups? No, but I can eat the ones that I buy at the grocery store.

10. What was the name of your first girlfriend/boyfriend? Tim

11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? Chief Illiniwek earrings

12. Favorite hobby? Playing the piano

13. Do you work with people who idolize you? OMG no! They barely tolerate me.

14. Do you have A.D.D.? Nope.

15. What's one trait that you hate about yourself? Procrastination

16. Middle name? Yep, I have one.

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment.
A. I'm dreading spending the weekend at the soccer tournament
B. I'm thrilled to be spending the weekend with Drama though
C. Can I leave work yet?

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday.
A. Starbucks skim mocha, no whip
B. Caesar salad
C. Fettucine

19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink.
A. Water
B. Coffee
C. Diet pop

20. Current worry right now? Money

21. Current hate right now? PMS

22. Favorite place to be? At BJ's place

23. How did you bring in the New Year? Trying to get to the Rose Bowl

24. Where would you like to go? BJ's place

25. Name three people who will complete this? Probably nobody

26. Whose answer do you want to read the most? Everybody's

27. What color shirt are you wearing? Maroon

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Not really

29. Can you whistle? Sort of

30. Favorite color(s)? Purple

31. Would you be a pirate? A real one, no. Dress up like one for a costume party, you bet!

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? Whatever earworm happens to be infecting me at the time.

33. Favorite girl's name? Lydia

34. Favorite boy's name? Christopher Robin

35. What's in your pocket right now? Lint

36. Last thing that made you laugh? N just being N

37. Best bed sheets as a child? They were all the same, boring light blue or white, nothing good about them. I guess the best ones I had were new ones, before the edges got frayed and they got holes in them.

38. Worst injury you've ever had? Probably the smashed foot after being run over by a car.

39. Do you love where you live? YES!!!!!

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 3

41. Who is your loudest friend? My best friend C. She's a hoot!

42. How many dogs do you have? 1

43. Does someone have a crush on you? Umm, maybe

44. Who is your favorite president? Bill Clinton

45. What is your favorite book? Gone with the Wind

46. What is your favorite candy? Currently Butterfingers hold an attraction

47. What is your favorite sports team? Fighting Illini of course!!

48. What song do you want played at your funeral? I Believe I Can Fly

49. What were you doing 12 AM last night? Sleeping soundly

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? Oh crap, overslept again

Hmph, Finally Found Something My "Real" Name is Good For

What's Sexy About Your Name

You are sexy because you are wild. You are a very sexually daring person. You are very into trying new and edgy things. You love taboos. You are a sexual dabbler. You like to take on unusual fantasies and roles. Anyone who wants to be your partner better be extremely open minded! You consider yourself a sex expert, and you love to give your friends advice. You feel like it's your personal mission to make everyone a little more sexually liberated.

What's Sexy About Your Name?

I'll Just Let This Speak for Itself

Cool!!

Random Facts I’m Pretty Sure Don’t Interest You

Random Fact #1
As I sat wondering why I had an uneasy feeling this morning I turned to my horoscope, and voila there it is:

You cannot put your finger on the source of your irritation today as the Moon in your 12th House of Secrets keeps something hidden from view. It feels important for you to find out what's missing, but the crucial information could elude your watchful eye. Instead of pushing for the truth, try accepting what you know while waiting for the rest to surface.

Yeah, I should have known it was that pesky Moon in my 12th House of Secrets.

Random Fact #2
I wore what I think of as my “tree outfit” today. Brown slacks (trunk of the tree) and green sweater (leaves) with embroidered flowers at the neckline. Do others think “tree” when they see me in this outfit? I doubt it.

Random Fact #3
N didn’t make a competitive basketball team for which he tried out last weekend. He and W were certain that he would make it. W chewed out the coach yesterday when the coach called to deliver the news. I, as always, am left to (1) tell N the bad news and (2) try to smooth things over with the coach who is a friend of mine and whose son is a friend of N’s.

Random Fact #4
I have a cold. In spite of feeling like I was coming down with this cold over the weekend, and in spite of being totally honest with BJ about that fact he continued to kiss me deeply and passionately at various times throughout the weekend risking his very health. Now that’s love.

Random Fact #5
I found one of my Illini t-shirts that had gone missing. Whose fault was it? Yeah, it was me. Just as I suspected. I put it away accidentally with N’s long sleeve shirts and found it when the weather was cold enough yesterday for me to get a long sleeve shirt out of his drawer for him to wear to school. There was the Chief’s final dance Illini shirt. Hmm, wonder where I’ll find the others?

Random Fact #6
I have no interest in politics today. They’ve worn me down and worn me out. Let’s just get to the election and get it over with, shall we? Thanks.

Maybe I Care Too Much

I have been struggling to put into words my feelings about the presidential race and having Sarah Palin in it. Then through one link to another I found this. It is a blog post by a very thoughtful person with more eloquence than I could ever have on the issue. Her words express my thoughts beautifully.

Please go and read. Please, if you are one of those caring people Elizabeth speaks of in her blog, one of those caring people who supports the McCain/Palin ticket, will you please leave a comment and tell me why? I'm trying to understand. I want to understand. I don't understand. Not at all. Please help me understand.

I LOVED This Quiz!

The Peach Random Gentle Love Master (RGLM) Playful, kind, and well-loved, you are The Peach. For such a warm-hearted, generous person, you're surprisingly experienced in both love and sex. We credit your spontaneous side; you tend to live in the moment, and you don't get bogged down by inhibitions like most women your age. If you see something wonderful, you confidently embrace it. You are a fun flirt and an instant sweetheart, but our guess is you're becoming more selective about long-term love. It's getting tougher for you to become permanently attached; and a guy who's in a different place emotionally might misunderstand your early enthusiasm. You can wreck someone simply by enjoying him. Your ideal mate is adventurous and giving, like you. But not overly intense. Your exact female opposite: The Nymph Deliberate Brutal Sex Dreamer Always avoid: The False Messiah (DBLM) Consider: The Loverboy (RGLM), The Playboy (RGSM), The Boy Next Door (RGLD)

Link: The Online Dating Persona Test | OkCupid - dating services | Dating

Soapbox Time Again

Until the presidential election is over I will continue to post what I believe to be relevant offerings with regard to the election. This is long, a bit more than eight minutes, but it is excellent, truly excellent. I hope you'll watch and listen, and most importantly, really hear and think about and process and question what is included here.

The One in Which New Fangled Technology Gets the Better of Trueself

The technologically unsavvy (spellcheck offered me unsaved, navy, and uncivil as alternatives but I do think I really meant unsavvy, even if it isn’t a proper word) among us, meaning me, is wondering about various things related to all this here new fangled gadgetry I’m trying, and not always succeeding, to use.

Instead of wandering down to my local electronics megastore with the big yellow sign on the front and taking up massive amounts of time (and probably paying for it) with the Geek Squad I thought I would toss my quandaries out here and see what answers I get. I know there are a few tech savvy folk out there that occasionally stop by. Please, help a damsel in distress here! (BTW, even though the questions may be presented with humor, they are serious questions. I want (need even?) real answers.) (And just how many parenthetical statements are allowed within one paragraph (and how many may be nested within one another?))

First Question
Desktop PC – What does it mean when the PC sounds as though it is a jet plane revving its engines for takeoff? Should I clear the desk, put away electronic devices, stow my tray table, and put my seatback in its upright position? Seriously though, is it a sign that my PC is becoming ill and is perhaps trying to warn me of its impending untimely demise, or is it a more benign condition?

Second Question
Laptop – If the screen does that old fashioned TV wavy screen scrolling thing how do you stop it? Is it trying to tell me that it is failing or that it is just trying to channel old Munsters reruns? If it does indeed fail, is the laptop a goner or can the screen be resurrected if the rest of the laptop is functioning well?

Third Question
MP4 (yes, it’s an MP4 rather than MP3) Player – If I can’t figure out how to work this off brand relatively cheap thing I bought online, and it came with no instructions am I doomed, or is there a chance someone out there could show me how I can get songs onto it so that I don’t have to listen to the one sample song that came with it over and over and over and over. . . ? BTW, I have had this thing for over a year now and am no closer to having it be usable than the day I got it.

Fourth Question
Cell Phone – If I try to download a ringtone, and it tells me I don’t have enough memory (even though I have never ever loaded a ringtone on it before) what can I do to get the ringtone? This is probably the most important question because a certain someone I know has the Iowa fight song as his ringtone so it is vitally important that I counter with the Illini fight song as mine.

Answers to any of these questions will be welcomed with overwhelming gratitude.

I Only Steal the Very Best

Disclaimer: I did not write this, it was taken from someone else's blog who stated that she took it from the comments on a political blog. Like the one I took it from I agree with everything stated..so there. :)

Some further reflections, about perspective, because the decisions Americans make in November are terribly important.

(1) If you're a minority and you're selected for a job over more qualified candidates you're a "token hire."
-- If you're a conservative and you're selected for a job over more qualified candidates you're a "game changer."

(2) Black teen pregnancies? A "crisis" in black America.
-- White teen pregnancies? A "blessed event."

(3) If you grow up in Hawaii you're "exotic."
-- Grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, you're the quintessential "American story."

(4) Similarly, if you name your kid Barack you're "unpatriotic."
-- Name your kid Track, you're "colorful."

(5) If you're a Democrat and you make a VP pick without fully vetting the individual you're "reckless."
-- A Republican who doesn't fully vet is a "maverick."

(6) If you spend 3 years as a community organizer growing your organization from a staff of 1 to 13 and your budget from $70,000 to $400,000, then become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new African American voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, then spend nearly 8 more years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, becoming chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, then spend nearly 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of nearly 13 million people, sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you are woefully inexperienced.
-- If you spend 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, then spend 20 months as the governor of a state with 650,000 people, then you've got the most executive experience of anyone on either ticket, are the Commander in Chief of the Alaska military and are well qualified to lead the nation should you be called upon to do so because your state is the closest state to Russia.

(7) If you are a Democratic male candidate who is popular with millions of people you are an "arrogant celebrity".
-- If you are a popular Republican female candidate you are "energizing the base".

(8) If you are a younger male candidate who thinks for himself and makes his own decisions you are "presumptuous".
-- If you are an older male candidate who makes last minute decisions you refuse to explain, you are a "shoot from the hip" maverick.

(9) If you are a candidate with a Harvard law degree you are "an elitist-out of touch" with the real America.
-- If you are a legacy (dad and granddad were admirals) graduate of Annapolis, with multiple disciplinary infractions you are a hero.

(10) If you manage a multi-million dollar nationwide campaign, you are an "empty suit".
-- If you are a part time mayor of a town of 7000 people, you are an "experienced executive".

(11) If you go to a south side Chicago church, your beliefs are "extremist".
-- If you believe in creationism and don't believe global warming is human made, you are "strongly principled".

(12) If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.
-- If you have been married to the same woman with whom you've been wed to for 19 years and raising 2 beautiful daughters with, you're "risky".

(13) If you're a black single mother of 4 who waits for 22 hours after her water breaks to seek medical attention, you're an irresponsible parent, endangering the life of your unborn child.
-- But if you're a white married mother who waits 22 hours, you're spunky.

(14) If you're a 13-year-old Chelsea Clinton, the right-wing press calls you "First dog."
-- If you're a 17-year old pregnant unwed daughter of a Republican, the right-wing press calls you "beautiful" and "courageous."

(15) If you teach abstinence only in sex education, you get teen parents.
-- If you teach responsible age appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.

Things That Make Me Chuckle

1. In our resource listing at work we have a “Loner Laptop.” I’m not sure if that means that only loners get to use it, or if it is the laptop itself that is a loner in which case it probably doesn’t like anyone using it. . .


2. At soccer practice when the coaches yell at the boys to “keep track of your balls.” (Yeah, I’m juvenile that way.)


3. In and Out Burger, a fast food chain on the west coast, and Kum and Go, a chain of gas stations in the Midwest (IA in particular).


4. When N tells me how immature other kids his age are (because, obviously, he’s the poster boy for maturity; yeah that’s the ticket).


5. The diversity training at my workplace, not because it isn’t needed, but because of the lame way they are doing it and also at how surprised management was when they surveyed the staff on diversity issues and found out how badly it was needed.

Ambling Rambling and Struggling

Eternal struggle, this whole identity, self-esteem, self-image, self-worth shit. Trying to balance my wants and needs and desires with filling the wants and needs and desires of others. Independence vs. codependence vs. total dependence. Wondering where to draw the line and where to bend, where to push and where to pull and where to just let go. Feeling unsettled, not quite unhappy but afraid that unhappiness is waiting in the wings. Wanting to hear messages I fear I will never hear. Trying to ignore the messages that don’t fit with what I want. Feeling comfort on one level and discomfort on another. Having that nagging gnawing feeling in the back of my brain that it isn’t going to be okay, that I’m selling myself short. Afraid to head in certain directions yet afraid not to. Running too much on fear and not enough on self-actualization. Focusing too much on self and not enough on God. Afraid to trust God’s leading because it very well may take me in a much different direction than my self (and selfishness) wants to go.

Wanting to feel like I matter, not because of how well I can serve others, but just because I am. Me. I want to matter. I want my wants, needs and desires to matter. I’m tired of being nobody. I want to be somebody. Somebody who counts. Somebody who matters.

Truth is that until I believe that I count, until I believe that I matter, it doesn’t really matter what anyone else believes or says or does. I need to be me. I need to believe in me. I need to stand up for me, and stop waiting for others to do for me. I need to find a way to be more dependent on me and less dependent on everyone else.

One Word for This Weekend

Ditto

Trueself as Soccer Mom

After certain incidents last year with regard to soccer and communication (or lack thereof) I took the bull by the horns this year and volunteered to be team parent for N’s soccer team.

Ha, I figured, now just let them try to keep me out of the loop on what’s happening. Now we’re just a little more than a week into it, and there are those already trying to keep me out of the loop. I’m the one that’s supposed to be the point person for the team parents, and there is at least one little group (doesn’t there always have to be one?) that is trying to go around me and do their own thing.

I only found out because one from their clique either accidentally or on purpose forwarded an email thread to me where they were making their own separate plans for accommodations at an out of town tournament apart from those I was coordinating. I sent an email back to all those whose email addresses were located somewhere in the thread asking them to keep me in the loop on where they decided to stay so I could book the coaches in there and let the other parents know where people were staying so that they too could book rooms there if they want and so that nobody felt excluded. Today I got an email back from their ringleader letting me know where they’ve booked rooms. I passed along the information to the entire team, and lo and behold, others do want to stay there too. Yep, we’ll have virtually the whole team staying at one hotel in spite of this clique’s original plans.

Score: Trueself 1, Clique 0

Sigh. . . do people ever grow up and try to be inclusive of everyone in the group, or will they always revert back to the juvenile behavior of having to be exclusive and keeping certain others out of their little wolf pack? And why do I suspect that the members of this little clique probably belonged to fraternities and sororities back in their college days? This elitist bullshit smacks of that same mentality.

Another of Life's Mysteries

Why is it that where I injured my left leg when I fell earlier this summer I have now sprouted fur? While my legs have always had some hair on them, it has always been sparse and fine and not terribly noticable until it gets pretty long. Now across my left leg a wide swath of black fur is growing. It is dense and dark and quite noticable after only a couple of days. It is very annoying because it means I either have to shave every day or two or wear pants to cover it.

So to anyone with any medical background (more than just playing a doctor on TV please) enlighten me. Am I simply a freak of nature or is this a common phenomenon with serious contusions? Is it likely temporary or permanent? Hit me with your best information. While you're at it, can you tell me how long it takes before the swelling and discoloration goes away with something like this?

BTW, please don't tell me to go ask my own doctor about these things. I have an upcoming appointment with her. I'll ask. I'm just throwing this out here in the meantime.

One of Life’s Unexplained Mysteries

What happened to all my Illini t-shirts? This is driving me absolutely freaking nuts! All my sweatshirts are still here, but the t-shirts are gone. Every single one of them (and I have a lot of Illini t-shirts), except my pink one from the cancer fundraiser last year, is missing. I have looked everywhere I can think to look, but they are gone.
Here’s my suspect list:

W –
Motive: piss me off;
Opportunity: still has access to the house;
Likelihood: Slim, for all his faults I find it hard to believe that he would do something like this, or if he did stoop that low I would think he would’ve taken the sweatshirts too.

Cleaning People –
Motive: wanting cool Illini t-shirts for themselves or family members;
Opportunity: had access to the house until I stopped using them a few weeks ago, and honestly I kind of knew I couldn’t find my Illini t-shirts but hadn’t looked very hard until this past week because I thought they had to be somewhere in the house;
Likelihood: Possibly could be although I hate to mistrust the hired help

BJ –
Motive: playing some juvenile Iowa Hawkeye prank on me;
Opportunity: has been in my house alone a few times;
Likelihood: So far my most likely suspect although if it turns out to be him all I can say is all that Iowa shit in his apartment is gonna be very, very vulnerable.

N’s friends –
Motive: wanting cool Illini t-shirts for themselves;
Opportunity: there have been several times when they’ve been upstairs in the bedroom areas playing hide and seek and other games;
Likelihood: If it was only one shirt, I’d say high, but to take all of them makes it less likely I think.

Me –
Motive: simply misplaced them and need to find scapegoat for blame;
Opportunity: endless;
Likelihood: extremely high

Chances of solving this case: Only time will tell. In the short run the chances are slim at best because I'm not willing to confront any of my suspects since I'm thinking that last one (Me) is the one to blame so I don't want to look like an ass by confronting others about it. In the long run, I stand maybe a 50/50 chance if I get the guts to confront anyone about it.

On the Campaign Trail

Secretive Right-Wing Group Vetted Palin

Well, I guess McCain had to find a way to get the right wing wackos on his side.

And then when I saw this I couldn't resist sharing so that you can LOL too.

see Obama pictures

News Too Cool Not to Share

UI researchers to develop an invisibility cloak - News

I swear, researchers at my alma mater come up with the coolest stuff!

Another Good One From WikiHow

I know, I know. The most boring blogposts in the world are when I just copy something from somewhere else without an original thought in my head. However, sometimes I just run across things that are so good I want to keep them somewhere I can find them, and this blog is for me not for you, dammit, so there.

And no, I don't really feel the need of this particular advice right now. We're doing just fine, thank you. I just liked a lot of what this had to say and kind of critiqued some of my past breakups against it. I've done a lot right, and a lot wrong, in past breakups. What a surprise. (NOT!)

How to Break Up

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

When you decide to end a relationship, what follows can be a difficult, sometimes torturous series of events, especially if the feelings are deep-rooted, circumstances are intertwined, and the break-up isn't mutual. It may be one of the hardest things you ever do, but otherwise, an unhealthy and unhappy relationship can drag on for years and perhaps even decades. Here's how to be strong and end it now.

Steps

1. Think about why you are breaking up with this person. If you are simply upset with your partner, you should consider talking about what upset you and focus on resolving it, rather than ending the relationship. But if this same issue has already been discussed, yet nothing changes and you keep feeling unsatisfied, hurt, or betrayed, then breaking up might be the only way to end the pattern. Your partner will ask you why you want out, and you should be prepared with answers. Before having "the talk" that ends the relationship, do your best to articulate the reasons you are breaking up. If you have trouble remembering examples during emotional discussions or arguments, write your reasons down in advance. It may help to talk this over with someone you trust, or with a counselor.
   
2. Plan out how long you are willing to spend breaking up. The actual conversation in which you break up with this person can last a lot longer than it should, especially if your partner is devastated or completely surprised by your decision. It'll be much easier for you to stick to your guns if the conversation doesn't drag out. Expect to spend at least one hour breaking up, and longer if the relationship lasted a year or more. You may even want to arrange an appointment with a friend in a neutral location so that you can say "I'm supposed to meet John/Jane at the restaurant in fifteen minutes, so I have to go now."
   
3. Break up in person. It is easier to break up with someone if you don't have to look the person in the eye, but it can also be interpreted as cruel and cowardly. Unless you are a long distance away and choose not to wait until you see the person again, don't break up by phone, e-mail, or through an instant messenger system. And don't even think about breaking up with someone by pulling a disappearing act, even if it's just by suddenly eliminating contact with the person. The lack of closure can be psychologically damaging.
   
   • If you don't live together, break the news at his/her home and in private. They'll want to feel safe enough to respond emotionally--no one wants to be broken up with in public or near family and friends, and risk bursting into tears, or be forced to bottle up all those emotions. While you can break up with them at your place, making someone go home after getting news like that will be difficult, and could make them more bitter. If you are at your partner's home, you can leave after you feel you've made your decision clear.
     
   • If you live together, breaking-up will be particularly problematic and stressful; you should have a place where you can stay until the person you've broken up with digests the big change. You can either move all of your stuff while they're not home and then break up when they come home and notice, or break up and leave with some of your things with the intention to come back when things have calmed down to get the rest of your belongings. Either way will be very difficult for the other person, but only you know what's best for your situation.
     
   
   
4. Break up calmly. If you say the dreaded words "We need to talk", your partner will immediately know what's going on, and that's not a bad thing. You don't want to blurt out "We need to break up" out of the blue, or worse, when you're in an argument. You need to approach the whole thing calmly and peacefully, with a sense of resolution. Sit down with your partner and let him or her know that you've decided to end the relationship.
   
5. Expect any or all of the following reactions.
   
   • Questioning -- He or she will want to know why, and whether there was anything he or she could have done to prevent the breakup. Answer the questions as honestly as possible.
     
   • Crying -- The other person will likely be upset, and it will show. You can comfort him or her, but don't allow yourself to be manipulated into changing your decision.
     
   • Arguing -- He or she may dispute anything you've said during the breakup, including examples you used in your reasons for breaking up. Don't get dragged into a fight, and don't split hairs. Let your partner know that arguing isn't going to change your decision.
     
   • Bargaining or Begging -- He or she may offer to change, or to do things differently in order to preserve the relationship. If the person didn't change when you've discussed your problems in the past, it is too late to expect him or her to truly change now.
     
   • Lashing Out -- Whether it's as simple as saying "You'll never find anyone as good as me" or as scary as saying "I'll make you regret this", he or she is usually just trying to make himself or herself feel better. Threats of physical harm, however, are serious and should not be ignored. If you feel that your safety is at risk, stay calm and leave quickly.
     
   
   
6. Distance yourself. It'll be difficult, but don't call them, don't go places where you know they frequent, and make yourself scarce. Take the time to reflect on your situation and learn more about yourself. Do all the things you've ever wanted to do, that you wouldn't have done if you were still with this person. Now is the perfect time to focus on those missed opportunities. Your ex may try to get in touch, but wait a while (some people suggest six months) before resuming contact, if at all. You felt close to this person at one point in your life, and you will probably always have a soft spot for him or her, but it's time for both of you to move on.
   

Tips

• If you are sure you want to break up with somebody, it is best done sooner rather than later. However, if your partner has had a particularly bad day already, you may want to consider waiting for a better moment. Breaking up with them when they are already down will make the break-up much harder for both of you.
  
• While honesty is the best policy, you may want to focus on the fundamental issues destroying the relationship and not nitpick on the little annoyances that drive you mad. Those annoyances are usually symptoms of the underlying problems--we're far more likely to get annoyed, irritable, and frustrated when we know the relationship isn't working out.
  

Warnings

• Never break up in the heat of the moment. If the relationship is already broken beyond repair, that won't change once the argument is over and the anger has passed. Break up with you're both calm and can talk it over peacefully. That's when you have the best chance of closure.
  
• Never threaten that you will break up with your partner. If you have problems or concerns, work through them or break up. Threats will only make a relationship worse and their impact tends to diminish with repeated use.
  
• Never use e-mail to end a relationship. E-mail might be perceived as a "non-confrontational" way to break up but it adds insult to what will likely be injury for the other party. An e-mail breakup also speaks poorly about the character of one who uses it for such a delicate task.
  

Related wikiHows

• How to End a Controlling or Manipulative Relationship
  
• How to Get Over a Break Up
  
• How to Break up With Someone Using Style and Sensitivity
  
• How to Fall Out of Love
  
• How to End a Relationship
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a collaborative writing project to build the world's largest, highest quality how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Break Up. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.