History of J and I: Part 1

J has played a major role in the saga of my life the last few months. I’ve shared that he and I were high school sweethearts, but I’ve never really shared our history here. For the sake of just wanting to do so I’m going to go back and fill in some of the missing pieces about some of my history.

The very first time I met J I was a sophomore in high school, and he was a freshman. He was in beginners’ band that year learning to play the trombone. I was learning, on my own time, to play the trombone. The band director was meeting with me privately at lunch time and sometimes after school to give me lessons. To my best recollection, beginners’ band met either just before or just after my lunch hour so that I would see the people from beginners’ band quite a bit. I also think that maybe Mr. D had me join the beginners’ band trombone players’ sectionals occasionally, but I’m not sure. Anyway, that’s when I first met J, but didn’t pay any attention to him at all. He was, after all, just a freshman and looked every bit the nerdy immature freshman boy. Also, I already had a boyfriend or few so wasn’t particularly looking though having a boyfriend never kept me from looking for, finding, or dating other boyfriends. I don’t know that we ever actually even talked to each other that year.

My junior year, J and I were both playing trombone in the high school band. That meant, with only four trombone players we were never sitting farther apart than one person away from each other because the guy that was first chair was always first chair no matter how many times I challenged him. I was almost always second chair (except when I lost the rare challenge by one of the lower chairs), and mostly J went back and forth with the other guy playing trombone for third and fourth chairs. I got along great with the guys that played trombone. (I always was better friends with guys than girls.) Junior year I rotated through/juggled several boyfriends, and didn’t give much thought to J. He was just a goofball that I hung around because we were trombone players.

My senior year, I was running short on boyfriends. For some reason, I was pretty much alone. I set my sights on J. I decided I wanted J as my boyfriend, and once I decided something like that I pretty much made it my mission to make it so. (Still do to tell the truth.) So the fall of the year was devoted to wooing J. It wasn’t easy. He had never dated anybody before. He was a geek. He wasn’t used to female attention. I don’t think he was sure he wanted female attention. But there I was. Throwing myself at him. Flirting with him. At every marching band festival, every rehearsal, every chance I got I was right there. Eventually, at the Halloween parade I finally got him to take me out afterwards. I don’t even remember where we went or what we did. I know that a lot of our later dates consisted of driving up to the bowling alley, bowling a couple of games, and then driving out to our favorite deserted country road to make out for a while. Making out for us consisted of kissing and a little above the waist petting. That was it. Although we were “going with” each other that never stopped me from my regular habit of dating other guys at the same time. It was just a different kind of dating with other guys, more focused on making out, less focused on anything else of a date nature. I never went with other guys to movies or the bowling alley or dinner, just J. I was a little warped in my thinking I guess. J and I continued dating right up to me leaving for college.