Thursday, August 02, 2007

Trying Times

Trying to fight something inside myself.
Trying to make myself okay with things that right now I'm not okay with.
Trying to not feel disconnected.
Trying to reconcile conflicting ideas in my head.
Trying to learn to accept people for who they are not who I want them to be.
Trying to not demand too much.
Trying to be more open to not being completely open.
Trying to figure out how much is too much to hide, how much is too much too share.
Trying to become who I genuinely am.
Trying to figure out if who I genuinely am is going to be okay with the rest of the world.
Trying to not care what the rest of the world thinks.
Trying to decide for myself right and wrong and their origins.
Trying to find where to turn for advice, insight, friendship, assistance.
Trying to decide if it is worth the effort to try so hard.

Then again, as Yoda said:
Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.


Val said...

Hey, I guess Yoda's not the worst source of advice!
Sorry you are feeling so much stress, my dear -- I need to post about my own; "misery loves company" if nothing else...

Trueself said...

Well, when you watch as much Star Wars as we do at our house (God bless 8-yr-old boys) you start to see great wisdom in those movies.

Gaaah! Did I actually say that? Criminy, am I ever glad I'm getting together with grown up types tomorrow. I'm regressing into an 8-yr-old boy!

Anonymous said...

Life - is just so freaking hard sometimes to figure out.

Trueself said...

EC - Yes it is. Freaking hard.