Sunday, November 30, 2008

Curiouser & Curiouser

In the past week things have certainly taken some interesting twists and turns. The following items are reported without organization but just as they pop into my head.

Q has moved in with W. Yep. Just like that. Just that quick. W asked me for "permission" to live with Q on Tuesday. "Permission?" I asked. "I don't really think I have any say in the matter, do I?" W replied that he thought I did since we're still married sort of. I laughed, and that was the end of the conversation. She moved in on Wednesday. Okay, so call me a prude and/or a hypocrite, but I just don't think it is setting the right example for N for W and Q to live together when N spends some nights at W's apartment. I do not ever have BJ sleep over with me when N is around. BJ and I are in agreement that it is inappropriate to do so at this stage of the relationship.

N and I spent Thanksgiving with my parents. Dad is doing surprisingly well. Apparently the chemo is doing its job, and the tumor in his liver is shrinking significantly. Mom is tired, chronically tired, although she won't come close to admitting it. As expected, she wouldn't let me help in the kitchen. Not as expected, she didn't make as big a dinner as in the past. She's tired. Dad gave me money to help me out a bit with my finances, not a lot, but enough that at least I now feel like I can afford a bit of a Christmas for N.

Friday night (well Saturday morning really) I was up around 3:30 for my nightly stumble into the bathroom. On the way back to bed I noticed through the window an SUV stop in front of the house two doors down. Three teenage boys got out, and the SUV drove away. The three boys proceeded to drag bag after bag of leaves from the two houses next door out into the street positioning the bags in a sort of blockade the full width of the street. As I watched them working I dialed 911 and reported their vandalism. Although the police arrived fairly quickly the boys were gone by the time they arrived. Yes, I'm becoming one of those grouchy old ladies that reports teenage pranks to the police.

W brought Q to church with him today. For no reason that I can understand, they were there early, early enough that they were there before I was, and I had to be there 15 minutes before Sunday School started as I'm serving a rotation as teacher for some of the kids. There she was, waiting to say hello as I hung up my coat. It took all my inner strength to stay for the service after Sunday School. I wanted to bolt out the door, but I didn't. I stayed. I stayed long enough to watch as W introduced Q to people while he had his arm around her waist. I stayed long enough to be greeted by her one more time during the passing of the peace. I stayed long enough to be nauseous. As soon as the service was over, I checked with W to make sure I knew that time he would be bringing N home (he had N this weekend), and I bolted out the door and home to BJ.

I had a meltdown this afternoon on the phone with W. I am so incredibly frustrated by his refusal to respond to me when I leave messages for him. The only time I leave messages for him is when it pertains to N or the divorce or our finances, all issues that are important. I never call him just to talk or for frivolous reasons. I am sick and tired of him not responding to me, and I let him know that in no uncertain terms. While he didn't apologize (no surprise there) he did acknowledge that he had been doing that and said he would change (yeah, wouldn't be the first time I've heard that about any number of things only to have things stay exactly the same).


Karin's Korner said...

I am glad that you had a nice Thanksgiving with your family and Thank God for dad's who want to give their daughters money. That is always a blessing.

I agree with you that it is not appropriate for N to stay with W while he has someone living with him. Here in NC, the parent (without someone living with them) can petition the court so that the girlfriend (in this case) has to leave the house when the child is to spend the night.

Just a thought.

Fusion said...

Lots going on there True, hope you can work out an arrangement with W and Q too for N's sleepovers...

Good luck!

Heh heh, word verf: painia (the condition you go through with W!)

Trueself said...

Karin - My dad is definitely a blessing to me.

Thanks for the info about the NC laws. I'll have to check here and see if we have something similar.

Fuse - Lots and lots going on. If you're ever bored just come to my house. I'm happy to share the chaos.

Hmm, painia, yeah I'm pretty sure I've got that condition! LOL