Thursday, September 28, 2006

Curiosity Gets the Better of Me

Alright, readers, I know you are out there, thanks to Tracksy. However, only a very few of you actually drop comments on my posts. This makes me curious. Why do you choose to comment or not comment? Please take the poll in my sidebar and let me know the reason that comes closest to describing your reason. If you choose other reason for commenting or not, I would love it if you would leave a comment on this post explaining your reason (I realize here that I'm not going to get a lot of comments saying "I don't comment and here's the reason" but I'd love it if I did!)

I haven't decided how long I'll leave the poll up or if I will leave it up permanently. I guess I'll wait and see if anybody actually responds to it.


New Girl said...

Although I chose the first answer in your poll, what I really wanted to say was "I only leave comments when I feel I have something to add to the discussion.

Many times, I don't feel like there is anything I can add to what you are saying. Having been in similar (kind of-I was the other woman to a married man) situations myself, I realize sometimes you just need to speak. It's not always useful to have someone talk back. Sometimes it is.

I'd rather try to say something important or helpful when I comment, rather than comment just to comment.

Stinkypaw said...

I used to comment regularly. I still do when I feel that there's something to add. You must know by the little exchange we've had that I'm not shy nor do I refrain from commenting in order to spare your feelings. We've agreed to disagreed and that's cool, but if I have nothing to say I won't.

BTW, I can also see that you've come around and not leave comments, what's your reason?! :-P

Rosie said...

I too have wondered why it I do go shy at some places and not leave a comment. But I'm really not shy in that true sense. Sometimes I do type and then delete - because I am afraid to give too much away, about me, and my situation. But I have gone back and read you from the beginning and have seen the change in you. My voice of experience says don't hesitate to reach out, BUT also be careful of your heart - try to use your head some also.

Seeker said...

I usually only comment when I feel I have something really uselful to say (or maybe occasionally when somebody says something that really makes me angry!)

While I'm here..... I am someone who has been married for 32 years. We did have one really awful spell when everything seemed to be going wrong. Many years later, everything is perfect now and I am so glad we saw the bad times through. So, don't think that things can never get better in your marriage. Sometimes they do.

Don't think I am not sympathetic though - I really feel for you and your obvious pain. I can well imagine how confused and unhappy you are. I feel really, really sad for you actually.

Where I do get frustrated with you is the fact that you are talking about BJ as being 'the one', the love-of-your-life' when you haven't even met him! I know that it feels as if you know somebody well when you have been in contact with them online for a long time. I know that such relationships can make your feelings very intense.

But..... whilst I know that BJ and you obviously have so much in common, you cannot (imho) really know someone until you have shared normal, everyday life with them. Get to meet BJ and know him, if you have to. But don't talk about him being 'the one' or about giving everything up for him until you do truly know him as he really is.

Well, you did ask for views! I wish you well anyway, no matter what you decide to do. Take care.

freebird said...

I have to agree there, Trueself.
And as for the commenting thing, I tried to leave a comment yesterday and got the dreaded network error message - which seems to be happening a lot lately - so there's another reason why people may appear to be remaining silent!
Are you going to publish the results of your poll? I'd be interested in knowing the outcome.

Pink said...

I don't always (well probably never) have any good advice to give so I try to just offer support. I too was ready to give up my marriage in search of "something better". I am glad that we worked it out and are now on the road to being as strong or stronger than ever. Whatever decision you make, I hope that you find your hearts desire.

trueself said...

Thank you all for your comments. I just find it curious why some people visit repeatedly yet don't leave comments. I don't always comment on others' blogs, sometimes not having time to do so, other times because I just don't feel that I have much to add to the discussion and don't want to comment just for the sake of commenting.
I always leave comments, however, if I do feel that I have something to add to the discussion and feel strongly about an issue being discussed.

Freebird, you can see the results of the poll as it stands now by clicking on "Current Results" at the bottom of the poll.

The most interesting thing I've found is that there are people who don't comment because they don't want anyone to know they read my blog. I'm not sure if that is more a reflection of them or on my blog, but I suppose I'll never know because they won't leave comments!

trueself said...

One other thought that I had is that I might get some of the non-commenters commenting if they could do it anonymously since not wanting to expose themselves as readers is an issue. However, I feel like anyone who isn't willing to put at least their relatively anonymous blog name to a comment isn't someone I probably wanted to hear from anyway. That's why I didn't allow anonymous comments in the first place.

spinningmia said...

To reply to seeker: I have met BJ "in real life" and he is exactly what he says online. Trueself, you already know by now ;), but believe me when I say that you absolutely cannot go wrong with BJ. He's very honest and forthcoming as well as just an all around wonderful man.