Saturday, September 09, 2006

Let's Get Physical. . . Please?

S called me late on Thursday afternoon. He has been very busy at work this week, unable to get away to spend time with me. I let him know that my period was over so we're free to do whatever whenever he and I can get together. He said "Great!" Then he said he had to go. Never heard from him yesterday. I will admit to a bit of frustration that he doesn't have sex with me as high on the priorities as I do, but then again beggars can't be choosers. And he has a real life he has to deal with, and I understand that. But damn it, I need some physical release here.

Z has me so worked up and while the phone sex and cyber sex with him is great, I need some honest to goodness skin to skin contact. And Z and I are working on making that happen, but the distance between us, and my real life, is preventing it for right now. We are both frustrated, and trying to be patient until we can meet, but it is mighty difficult. We spent four hours last night chatting away on the computer. We've talked a lot about sex, but we've also started to talk about a lot of other things too. We are getting to know each other in many ways. There is something really special here. This wasn't at all in my plans, and I'm still trying to figure out the best course of action here. All I know right now is how Z makes me feel, and he makes me feel better than I have in a long, long time. But real life has some real obstacles in our way. Can we find a way around these obstacles? Only time will tell.

W told me yesterday that the night before he had tried to start something with me when he came to bed. Unfortunately, he came to bed at 1:00 a.m. so I was sound asleep, and he said he was unable to awaken me. Uh-huh. I think he deliberately waited until he knew I was good and asleep. I believe it is just one more way of getting points for trying without having to actually do anything. This way he wanted to and it's my fault, not his, that nothing happened. Sorry, buddy, I'm on to this game. No points for you on this one.

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