Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Just Wondering

Do you ever find yourself wondering about other people’s sex lives? I find that I do. Maybe it’s because of how sporadic mine is (but at least I have one now occasionally, unlike a year ago) that I dwell on it. Maybe it’s because of how many blogs I read by people with less than stellar sex lives. Maybe it’s because, gosh darn it, I’ve pretty much got a one track mind.

Whatever the reason, I find that I wonder about people and what their sex life is like. It might be a coworker. It might be an acquaintance. It might be the plumber coming in to fix the leaky pipes. It might be the woman sitting at the next table all alone at the restaurant. It might be, but not as often, someone I just pass by on the street. It doesn’t have to be someone to whom I’m attracted or repulsed or anything in between. It is more an academic question in my mind, a curiosity about how often, how satisfied, how faithful, how creative, how willing.

At the mall I see quite a few older couples who walk for exercise. When I see a couple walking together I often wonder do they still have sex? Enjoy it? Are they in synch with their level of desire? Have they had rocky times and come through it? Are they still in rocky times but just given up or given in?

I wonder about coworkers who are married with young children or older children or no children at all. What do they do behind closed doors? Are they happy about it? If they are unsatisfied are they seeking gratification elsewhere or sacrificing that part of life for love of their partner? Did they have sex last night, and if so, was it good? Was it what they wanted or did it leave them wanting? Did they try and get turned down. . . again? Did their partner try, yet again, and frustrate them with their demand for more than what they want to give?

Yes, I’m nosy. Oh yes I am. I would never walk up to any of these people and ask them any of the above questions, but I do wonder if they have blogs that I could read. Then I wonder if perhaps I already am. Perhaps every day I’m sitting and reading about the life of the woman down the street, the man across town or in the next cubicle. I’ll probably never know, and I don’t really think I want to know because if I found out that one of my favorite blogs was written by someone I knew well there might be just a bit of a discomfort in knowing the intimate kinds of things that I know. With BJ it’s different because we are intimate and know each other intimately anyway so reading each other’s blogs isn’t discomforting to me. As curious as I am, I’m just not sure I want to know that Joe in the next cubicle over begged his wife for oral last night and got turned down yet again. I’d rather just know about abstract people from the blogosphere that I don’t have to look in the eye on a regular basis. Maybe that’s why as much as I think there are bloggers I’d like to meet, I’m also hesitant about it too. Walking up and meeting someone about whom I know so many secrets and intimate details would feel just a bit, umm, weird. Particularly now that you all know what my nekkid butt looks like.


Fiona said...

Hahahahahahaha your last line cracked me up!!!

I don't wonder too much about sex...but I do wonder about people's lives. I'm terrible about looking in shopping baskets at the supermarket. Spotting the binger (we know what to look for), the dieter, the alcoholic, the family basket, etc.

I'm a huge people watcher at airports, I love wondering where they're going, why, are they travelling to or from something specific, etc.

Sex....hmmmm nope can't say I dwell on that much. I don't have an overly-strong libido though, never have had. Not saying I don't absolutely love and crave intimacy with my man, but that's about it, for me :)

Great post ;)

Leigh said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stinkypaw said...

* Damn it! Had written a long comment, and Blogger ate it! *

You're too funny! And no, you're not alone thinking this way - I do too. I often wonder about the type of sex, if any, some people have. We have a friend that every time I see him dance can't help to wonder how he is during sex, because he's so ackward...

BTW, you're one gutsy lady! And I was wondering, since I'm also curious, who took that picture? ;-)

Val said...

Alright -- comment box working! That means TYPE LIKE HELL!!!
I probably alienate my friends throwing out TMI now & then about MY sex life, but like you, I'm curious:
How many of my "average" friends have anal and/or oral sex?
Any experimentation w/bondage/low-key S & M?
& how do you REALLY feel about porn?
OK, I'd better quit while I'm ahead; great post TS!

Uhave said...

I think about other people's sex life in the exact same way. See...you're not the only one who's nosy.

Trueself said...

Glad to know I'm not alone in my thoughts.

SP - Thanks, and W took the picture the weekend he was up here in LNJ. I had just gotten out of the shower, and he was getting the camera ready to go to the new house to take "before" pictures. In a fit of playfulness, he acted as though he were going to take my picture, and I responded by opening my towel and giving him the chance. That's the pic I didn't post, showing full frontal nudity. Then I turned around and was drying my leg when he snapped the "rearview" picture.

oldbear said...

HI Lady, I too wonder about such things, but usually only about people who catch my eye or strike my fancy.
Of course being the sexually overevved guy I am, that covers a large swath of the female population. Ha Ha!

Dont sweat the picture babe, if you are sexy, its part inside and outside.

It depends on what kind of body and self image YOU are comfortable with.

Kudos to you for being you! OB

Trueself said...

OB - Good to see you. I'd missed your comments lately. Thanks for your kind words.

Unspoken Drama said...

I think about it all the time...like wondering about the people that I work with, or the guy who's fixing my dryer, and on and on. I normally don't wonder about people that are close to me, such as relatives and such...that's too freaky for me. LOL But those random people that I encounter or work with, yup...I thought I was the only one.


freebird said...

Oh yes, I wonder about it all the time! I also wonder if the friends who can't let a conversation go by without a reference to their incredibly active sex life are putting up a huge smokescreen to hide their celibacy... or if the the totally tacit ones are at it like rabbits!

Trueself said...

Drama - I guess I even wonder about those close to me although I'm a bit ambivalent about whether I really want to know about some of the closest people to me.

FB - I think you truly can't tell just by the way people do or don't talk about it which is of course one reason I wonder about it so much!