Sunday, April 01, 2007

I'm Baaaaack!

Yes, life is back to "normal." In the context of my life, that means that I'm back in LNJ, W and N are back in LOH, and life moves forward.

Here are a few highlights from the week from hell:

aWithin 24 hours of their arrival, we had experienced yelling, crying, whining, arguing, and frustration beyond measure.
aBy last Sunday afternoon, I was so frustrated that I insisted W take N to a park to give me a bit of a break.
aHad the worst times over the house key. I left it with W during the day while I was at work so he and N could come and go throughout the day. W made very little effort to accomodate my schedule at all so I didn't get to go home for lunch like I normally do until I had such a fit on Wednesday evening about it that he made sure to be home at lunchtime on Thursday and Friday.
aAlthough I understand people like to sleep in when they are on vacation, I still had to get up and get ready for work each weekday morning. Given that it is a one room house it is just impossible to be quiet enough to not disturb everyone. I can only shower as quietly as the shower allows. I cannot be totally silent when making my breakfast. Due to the lack of space, I cannot help jostling the bed slightly as I squeeze by when the sofa bed is folded out. Shame on me. Shame, shame, shame for disturbing other people's vacation by going out and earning a living. God forbid.
aI only had peach jam, no strawberry jam, on hand. The reason that I keep peach jam is because I like peach jam, and I live alone so I buy what I like. Apparently only the meanest mom in the world wouldn't run out and buy strawberry jam so that a small amount could be used during the week that N is here, and then left behind. Okay, well, guess I'm the meanest mom in the world.
aLast week reaffirmed for me just how much W is happy with the status quo. He doesn't want to change, doesn't want to work on making things better. His focus is on me becoming happy with the way things are. I just don't think I can be happy the way things are.

It's late. I need to get to bed. More later.


Fiona said...

I'm sorry you had such a crappy time TS. Forced cohabitation in a severely confined area is never fun.

Do you think maybe this has happened to help you see things as they will continue to be?

I'm glad you have your peace and solitude back.

Emily said...

Well, sometimes events just clarify the questions in our minds!

Do you think it is worth saying all that to W? Saying that, despite all the discussions, the counselling, that week suggested to you that: (1) You won't be happy unless things change and (2) He seems to have no real interest in changing.

It doesn't have to be an ultimatum - just an observation.

freebird said...

Oh dear, TS, I was hoping to share a huge sigh of relief with you on seeing the title of your post, but it wasn't that kind of post at all, was it. I'm so sorry.

Karin's Korner said...

Who's turn my friend?

trueself said...

Fiona - Yes, it certainly made things a bit more clear to me.

Emily - Yes, I think I will say that very thing to him next weekend when I'm back at LOH.

FB - Sorry to have disappointed you. I too wish I'd been sharing better news of some sort.

Karin - Huh? Who? Me?

Al Laddin said...

Looks like there may be a new "status quo" for someone to get used to.

Unspoken Drama said...

I'm so sorry Trueself. I wonder though if this will be the catalyst to help you make that final decision. I wish you peace and clear thought. *hugs*