Friday, December 21, 2007

Blindsided

Yesterday was a tough day. It didn't start out that way, and I didn't see most of it coming. As the day wore on however, things seemed to go awry in one way or another.

Learning about the untimely death of the neighbors' dog was just one in a day full of crap.

It started with a conversation with an attorney firm regarding the upcoming divorce. The conversation didn't go as I would have liked.

Later in the afternoon, after learning of the dog's death, a conversation with BJ went somewhat awry although truth be told I'm not sure just how justified I am in feeling as I do about the situation.

In the course of the day, N informed me that he wishes he had a better and younger mom than me. That always warms my heart.

Attended the Illini basketball game only to watch them lose in overtime. I hate that they came back to tie it up in regulation only to lose in OT.

Yeah, I know. Most of these things are little things, no big deal. Every kid tells his mom that she's a rotten mom sometimes. Basketball teams lose games and life goes on. However, yesterday felt like one thing after another making me feel a bit like "Why even try?"

Sure hope today goes a little better.

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I'm finding that today I'm feeling rebellious. At least to me it feels rebellious. Since obviously nobody else takes into account my feelings when saying and doing things (N had quite the snit this morning) I'm just thinking I should start making decisions without taking into account how it might impact others. I think I should just do what I want to do and to hell with what others think or how it might impact others. Enough worrying that I might hurt someone or drive them away. From now on, to hell with all of them. I'll just do things my way. So there! [Turns, flips hair, and flounces away in a huff.]

5 comments:

Val said...

"...conversation with an attorney firm regarding the upcoming divorce. The conversation didn't go as I would have liked."
??? Inquiring minds want to know???
But seriously, you DO have to balance your needs w/what the rest of the world wants -- although probably Lil' Miss Queen-of-Enmeshment here is not the best source of advice ("do what I say, not what I do!")...
[Word verification is prophetic: bmeryesc => "Be Merry-esque"; I can dig it!]

Stinkypaw said...

You so read just like my mom after she's been told something she didn't want to hear. ;-)

Like I often tell my mom: Say it and mean it! and then DO IT!

Trueself said...

Val - The attorney thing was just a comedy of errors brought about I believe by being short staffed during the holidays. I have an appointment in person next week after Christmas so I'll update then.

SP - Give the lady a prize for hitting the nail right on the head! And yes, I need to take that advice.

Sixdegrees said...

"do what I want to do and to hell with what others think or how it might impact others."

Absolutely!

Trueself said...

Six - Hmm, it goes so against my grain to do so it's hard for me to really do it.