Saturday, February 02, 2008

That Was Weird

Just like almost everything in my life these days, the talk with W was weird. Well, not the talk itself, but the fact that W fell asleep during the talk. At least that seems weird to me.

Before he went to sleep though, I guess the talk went as well as one could expect. Mostly I talked and he listened. After a while though I stopped talking and just waited. Eventually, he did engage in some amount of discussion. He tried the "I'll leave and neither you or N will ever see me again" tactic a couple of times. Both times I replied to him that I don't think that would be the best choice for him to make, particularly for N, but that if he makes that choice so be it. When that one didn't work, he tried the "But I'm working so hard to make things better. How can you be so ungrateful?" tactic a couple of times too. I told him that I recognized that he's tried, and I've tried too. We haven't been successful in spite of trying. I'm tired of trying and waiting, and I think it's time to move on. I also added that if I stayed longer it would not be out of love or commitment, but only out of feeling that I am being held hostage to emotional blackmail. That hurt him I know, but it's true, and I felt like I had to say it that strongly for him to really understand that this is over, for real and for true, that he must get out of my house. I know we got to that point of understanding before he dozed off.

Damn, I did it. I really truly did it. I really am strong after all.

Now, do I just leave him sleeping on the sofa, or wake him and tell him he should go to bed? Yeah, I think leave him on the sofa. I'd rather just not have more of this conversation until tomorrow when he's had some time to think about it. . . or sleep on it. . . or whatever. . .

7 comments:

Jaded Bunny said...

He went to sleep?

Sleep?

What an idiot.

Well, at least he will soon be sleeping elsewhere.

Summer said...

He fell asleep?!! That's how important the talk was to him. Good ridence to him. You're better off going it alone. It will be hard but everyday will get easier.

Bunny said...

O.M.G. - I can't believe he fell asleep!! Wow.

Good for you! Doesn't it feel better to have gotten it all out? I suspect N will not be surprised at all and may actually be good with W moving out. I'm sure he feels the tension and recognizes that things aren't good.

Now let's see if W actually goes . . . .

Drama said...

I have to echo what everyone else has said....HE FELL ASLEEP?? OMG..I hope he moves out and quickly. Did he just start snoring while you were talking or what? I am nearly speechless.

Trueself said...

JB - Yes, idiot fits well I think. And as you said thank goodness he will be sleeping elsewhere soon.

Summer - I'm so much better off going it alone.

Bunny - N didn't take the news well this evening. He blames himself in spite of my repeated assurances that it is not his fault. I asked if he'd like to talk to a counselor, and he said yes. He had a real good experience with counseling a couple of years ago when he was dealing with another issue so I think it will be good for him.

Drama - It just takes the cake, doesn't it? It was really one more of those really warm fuzzy moments of which we've had so many in the past few years.

freebird said...

I'm flabbergasted!

Trueself said...

FB - I will admit to having a bit of that same reaction when it happened.