Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Bits and Pieces

  • K and I won't be able to get together again until after he returns from a business trip week after next. Bummer.
  • Bi group is having a Halloween party this weekend. I have no clue what costume to wear, but I would like it to be something clever and creative. Unfortunately I'm an accountant without a creative bone in my body.
  • N recently point blank asked me if W and I are the tooth fairy, Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. I tried the tactic my mom used with me which was to say that only those that believe continue to receive gifts from them. No go. He wouldn't go along so now he knows. He doesn't feel betrayed. He has kind of a sense of wonder that Mom and Dad are nice enough to get him the kind of gifts only Santa has brought.
  • I still haven’t made up my mind about spending a weekend with BJ or not. On the one hand, I’ve already agreed to it and cancelling would just bolster his feelings that I’m just like all the rest of the women he’s been with. On the other hand, so what? He can’t be the center of the universe. Get over it.
  • BJ is as much or more victim of believing in the fairy tale as I am. His perception that so many others out there are so perfectly happy together in couples is so far off base he has no idea. Relationships are work. Good relationships require a lot of work. It ain’t just gonna fall in your lap.
  • There are plans in the works for me and Unspoken Drama to meet in real life in the not too distant future. How will it feel to sit across the table and have lunch with someone who knows the worst there is to know about me? Then again, I know a little about her too, don’t I?
  • Just how much honesty is good in my marriage? That’s a big quandary for me right now. I’m a little (oh who are we kidding here, a whole lot, bigger than a whole lot) tired of the cover stories, the excuses, the lies used to cover me as I live a life beyond the confines of my marriage.
  • If a person will not stay with you without coercion being applied in some manner at some level then you really don’t have much of a relationship. Why fight to maintain a relationship like that?

As usual, more questions than answers here.

2 comments:

stinkypaw said...

Honesty is good everywhere, and like anything else in a relationship, it does require work.

If we could stop being afraid (of hurting the other, of being ourselves, of what people might think) we would be so much better!

That last bullet, whenyou've reach that point, no need to fight, it's over!

Trueself said...

Yes we would be ever so much better.